I recently walked past someone that made a comment to themselves. The comment instantly upset me and after thinking about it I realized I've made similar comments myself. What was the comment I overheard? "...you are so stupid!" The context of the statement came after she made a mistake and the instant response she had was to verbally put herself down. How many times does this happen? We make a mistake and instantly say or think something that puts us down. We are far more kind to others who make a mistake then we are to ourselves. The unfortunate result of this common behavior is a hit to our self-worth.
Your self-worth is entirely set at the value YOU give it. No one else has that power unless we hand it over to them and allow the words and actions of others to become our own thoughts of ourselves.
I've shared before a particularly bad time in my life when I attacked myself as I stood in front of the bathroom mirror telling myself I was not only unlikable I was unloveable. This is an example of me clearly attacking myself but what about those small moments before that day. The moments I made under the breath comments or internal thoughts knocking myself down. For me the little moments I spent putting myself down is what brought me to that big moment in my bathroom.
While I was working with a coach she told me the mind believes whatever you tell it, the more you say negative things the more real that becomes. So flip the switch on that behavior and turn every negative thought into positive and see how that impacts your life. I was challenged to watch for signs where I think or say something negative about myself and flip the switch. It was such a wake-up call. It wasn't even that I was thinking "oh Alycia you're an idiot" it was things like "oh wow look how amazing she did that, I can't do that" or even "wow you definitely need extra concealer today."
Flipping the switch is so important to change how you view yourself and your self-worth. I not only ask my clients to focus on what they think and say about themselves and flip the switch when it's negative; I still do this today myself. Every day we have challenges, successes, and yes even failures but when we still focus on the positive in us our self-worth increases.
Over the next few days listen to yourself, in what ways do you need to flip the switch? Are there examples of thoughts that when you thought about it you realized it needed to be flipped?